Kingdoms Associated Press



09/08/1468 The King Arrives in a Divided Sussex

The King Arrives in a Divided Sussex

Every county has its internal rivalries and conflicts. Sussex however has seen issue after issue come to its shores. The County has been rife with political and social drama for months. There were four lists and that number eventually increased to include a fifth list, an unusual amount of lists in the English counties, which is also symbolic of the heights that division has reached in every level of politics within the county. (WoC) Wind of Change have certainly proven themselves to be a dominant new political party in the previous election as well as this election.

Sussex United (SA) (Castle, Daisydread, Helenn, made it onto council)

Warding off Criminals (WoC) (Eric, was the only person who made it onto council from his list)

The Ham Party (HAM) (Jacklionheart, was the only person who made it onto council from his list)

Sussex Pride (SP) (Desdemona_alarica, was the only person who made it onto council from her list)

Wind of Change (WOC) (Endimion_kingsman, Donnatela_kingsman, Garolin_kingsman, Dwight., Nazarick, Skade, made it onto council)


Rumors around the Royal Tour tell the tale of an eventful journey for His Royal Majesty the King and his retinue. So a tumultuous political and social atmosphere in their final leg of the tour of England should be relatively unremarkable for the King and his companions. It all began in Westmorland with the Captain of the Guard bravely impersonating the King, while the King dutifully attended to matters of, well, we aren’t quite sure. That is the million pound question isn’t it? What does the King do when he leaves the tavern and when he isn’t seeing to matters of Royal Court? He appears to be quite busy enough with his traditional duties, yet even in his spare time he rushes off to ‘important business’. His Royal Majesty the King keeps late hours as was made evident by an incident where Royal Marching bands were outlawed due to the King being woken up by a ruckus too early in the morning. What keeps his Royal Majesty awake and busy at night?

This Journalist endeavored to find out! I started my investigation based on a rumor that after the Royal Tour had been reveling in the taverns in Arundel, the Royal Guard had been stationed all night outside of a sheep pen, keeping everyone away from the pen. When I asked the Royal Secretary where the King had been, I was given the answer that the Royal Secretary “Declined to comment”. I then asked the Mayor of Arundel what might have been occurring and to comment on the quality of sheep from her town.

The Mayor of Arundel, Lady Aerietta Palidor Westbrooke Boot informs me that her sister, Lady Zulita Palidor Westrbrooke: “got the King rather drunk”, and the Mayor then stated, “so who knows what happened.”, additionally the Mayor pointed out that the King and his guard stayed behind an extra day while the rest of the tour moved on. Due to His Royal Majesty’s prolonged stay in addition to the mysterious activities around the sheep pen, one might infer that the sheep of Arundel are worthy of Majestic attentions!


I then went to the Captain of the Royal Guard for comment. While overseeing the activities of his guard the Captain had this to say:

"Despite rumours to the contrary, I will state for the record that no sheep have been recruited into the Royal Guard, and certainly not on the orders of His Majest…. STOP THAT NOW YEOMAN WOOLLY MCFLEECEY THAT IS NOT FOR EATING!!… on the orders of His Majesty the King. I will not make any further comments on the matter." - Sir Andreas P Sharpe , Captain of the Royal Guard.


It seemed one of his “fresh recruits” decided that his uniform was rather tasty looking and ill fitted for wearing. Despite the Captain's insistence a local noble, Lord Matrim Matr R. Rondoval had this to say:

“Yes I sold my finest sheep to the Guard, I'm not sure what they wanted with it. But I did hear rumors about His Majesty the King holding sheep in high regard. We treat our sheep like family here in Sussex, but in preparation of the King's visit we made sure they had a little extra grooming to catch his Royal Majesty’s eye.”

Lord Matrim went on to describe his previous experience selling livestock to Royalty. He seemed quite proud to have sold, not only this sheep but many years ago, he traded goats to a previous king, His Majesty Cullan the First.

I was fortunate enough to be graced with a response for request to comment by His Royal Majesty King Richard Rex himself, who said:

“Sheep need to be bred, led, and fed. They will always have a shepherd in Richard Dorchester.”

The only thing which we cannot glean from this is that His Royal Majesty the King of England does not have an affinity for sheep. We could speculate that perhaps the King enjoys counting sheep before he rests for the night, but then he wouldn’t need to spend the whole night in the pasture. We can only conclude that he has a healthy respect for the quality of sheep bred, raised and sheltered, as the good noble Matrim put it; "like family". Long live the King, and long live the majestic sheep of England!

By Mortyn for the KAP.

21/07/1468 Election of Devon's council : A/C have obtained the absolute majority of the seats.

LONDON (AAP) – The list The Ambiguous Collective have taken the lead in the Devon county council election race, and have gained an absolute majority of the seats. They can govern alone.

Result of the vote :

1. "The Ambiguous Collective" (A/C) : 100%

The seats of the council have been split in proportion to the election votes:

1 : Fratley (A/C)
2 : Cullen_veilcrest (A/C)
3 : Redmilla_passion (A/C)
4 : Patan (A/C)
5 : Dranoel (A/C)
6 : Alysrose (A/C)
7 : Delissia (A/C)
8 : William_armaduras (A/C)
9 : Annelancaster (A/C)
10 : Duke (A/C)
11 : Spittfire (A/C)
12 : Katelyn_hamilton (A/C)

The members of the council will recognize the new Count(ess) in two days. The Count(ess) will have to present the county's respects to the King and appoint the councillors to their new positions.

18/07/1468 Election of Mercia's council : ATOM have obtained the absolute majority of the seats.

LONDON (AAP) – The list Alliance for a Transparent and Open Mercia have taken the lead in the Mercia county council election race, and have gained an absolute majority of the seats. They can govern alone.

Result of the vote :

1. "Alliance for a Transparent and Open Mercia" (ATOM) : 100%

The seats of the council have been split in proportion to the election votes:

1 : Eddward (ATOM)
2 : Belrathius (ATOM)
3 : Jane_myxti (ATOM)
4 : Amda (ATOM)
5 : Vivienne_degrey (ATOM)
6 : Yashraj (ATOM)
7 : Clara_palidor (ATOM)
8 : Nicol_flamel (ATOM)
9 : Aslov (ATOM)
10 : David.bar.kochba (ATOM)
11 : Fleta (ATOM)
12 : Galrador (ATOM)

The members of the council will recognize the new Count(ess) in two days. The Count(ess) will have to present the county's respects to the King and appoint the councillors to their new positions.

17/07/1468 A treasure unearthed in Lyon

Today Tombetouts unearthed a box containing 10000 pounds at Lyon. The rumours about treasures buried deep underground seem to have been substantiated ...


27/06/1468 Election of Westmorland's council : KWS have obtained the absolute majority of the seats.

LONDON (AAP) – The list Keep Westmorland Safe have taken the lead in the Westmorland county council election race, and have gained an absolute majority of the seats. They can govern alone.

Result of the vote :

1. "Keep Westmorland Safe" (KWS) : 59.6%
2. "Passionate and enthusiastic Westmorlanders" (PEW) : 40.4%

The seats of the council have been split in proportion to the election votes:

1 : Florianos (KWS)
2 : Juliannabariman (KWS)
3 : Anneke (KWS)
4 : Ailith_ (KWS)
5 : Amalea_rondoval (KWS)
6 : Mortyn (KWS)
7 : Rominus (KWS)
8 : Ophelia_wolfe (PEW)
9 : Nathaniouse (PEW)
10 : Itamar (PEW)
11 : Arckangels (PEW)
12 : Sienan (PEW)

The members of the council will recognize the new Count(ess) in two days. The Count(ess) will have to present the county's respects to the King and appoint the councillors to their new positions.

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Cours

Product Price Variation
Loaf of bread 4.56 -0.28
Fruit 9.92 0
Bag of corn 3.7 0.87
Bottle of milk 9.48 0.11
Fish 20.26 0.06
Piece of meat 12.25 0.13
Bag of wheat 10.89 -0
Bag of flour 12.88 1.64
Hundredweight of cow 20.53 0.33
Ton of stone 10.44 -0
Half-hundredweight of pig 15.41 0.05
Ball of wool 10.86 -0.14
Hide 16.32 -0.06
Coat 49.5 0
Vegetable 9.38 -0.18
Wood bushel 4.19 0.08
Small ladder 20.18 0
Large ladder 68.02 0
Oar 20 -0
Hull 36.49 0
Shaft 8.16 -0.14
Boat 99.33 0.63
Stone 18.32 -0.11
Axe 150.74 0
Ploughshare 38.44 0
Hoe 30 0
Ounce of iron ore 11.52 0.2
Unhooped bucket 21.88 0
Bucket 37.73 0
Knife 17.89 0
Ounce of steel 49.04 -0.06
Unforged axe blade 53.91 0
Axe blade 116.44 0
Blunted axe 127.79 -2.51
Hat 53.38 0.08
Man's shirt 119.57 0.12
Woman's shirt 121.14 0
Waistcoat 141.4 0
Pair of trousers 74.61 -0.09
Mantle 257.82 0
Dress 265.04 -0.2
Man's hose 45.63 -0
Woman's hose 44.32 0
Pair of shoes 27.53 -0.01
Pair of boots 86.57 0
Belt 45.2 -0
Barrel 12.02 0
Pint of beer 0.82 0
Barrel of beer 66.51 2.5
Bottle of wine 1.66 0
Barrel of wine N/A N/A
Bag of hops 19.34 0
Bag of malt 10 0
Sword blade 101.19 0
Unsharpened sword 169.69 0
Sword 146.48 -0.07
Shield 36.91 0
Playing cards 73.55 -0
Cloak 180.72 0
Collar 68.35 -0.06
Skirt 135.35 0
Tunic 222.36 0
Overalls 115.73 0
Corset 117.2 0
Rope belt 53.86 0
Headscarf 60.73 0
Helmet 164.91 0
Toque 48.61 0
Headdress 79.65 0
Poulaine 64.02 0
Cod 11.36 0
Conger eel 12.81 0
Sea bream 18.31 0
Herring 17.43 0
Whiting 17.42 0
Skate 12.16 0
Sole 18.11 0
Tuna 12.51 0
Turbot 18.02 0
Red mullet 16.53 0
Mullet 12.47 -0
Scorpionfish 20.5 0
Salmon 16.51 0
Arctic char 12 0
Grayling 14.77 0
Pike 17.6 0
Catfish N/A N/A
Eel 15.09 0
Carp 17.98 0.03
Gudgeon 17.68 -0.04
Trout 17.51 0
Pound of olives 13.38 0
Pound of grapes 9.18 0
Sack of barley 10.67 0
Half-hundred weight of goat carcasses 18.99 0
Bottle of goat's milk 12.81 0
Tapestry 143.6 0
Bottle of olive oil 121.94 -0
Jar of agave nectar N/A N/A
Bushel of salt 19.89 0
Bar of clay 3.43 -0
Cask of Scotch whisky 93.32 -0
Cask of Irish whiskey 131.27 0
Bottle of ewe's milk 10.57 0
Majolica vase 10 0
Porcelain plate N/A N/A
Ceramic tile N/A N/A
Parma ham 84.97 0
Bayonne ham 34.65 -0
Iberian ham 70.28 0
Black Forest ham 54.72 0
Barrel of cider 51.16 0
Bourgogne wine 76.22 0
Bordeaux wine 60.89 0.31
Champagne wine 141.21 -5.25
Toscana wine 33.69 0
Barrel of porto wine 87.44 0
Barrel of Tokaji 163.71 0
Rioja wine 159.19 0
Barrel of Retsina 36.79 -0
Pot of yoghurt 85.17 -0
Cow's milk cheese 77.07 0
Goat's milk cheese 85.06 2.5
Ewe's milk cheese 52.26 0
Anjou wine 50.88 -0
Ewe carcass 15.03 0
Mast 456.7 0
Small sail 215.71 0
Large sail 838.79 0
Tumbler of pulque N/A N/A
Jar of pulque N/A N/A